A couple of years ago, I found some truly terrifying two-sentence horror stories on the Internet. I decided to try writing a few of my own. Now, for Halloween, I present another batch. And once again, you may want to avoid reading them if you have a heart condition.
The meeting starts in five minutes. The office copier says “CALIBRATE COLLATION DENSITY PARAMETERS.”
I accept my father-in-law’s friend request. Five minutes later, he posts his first racist joke on my timeline.
“You thought this was a date?” she says. “Oh gosh.”
“I like to think of my poetry as ‘anarcho-conceptualist,'” he said. “Let me explain.”
“You have a choice,” the wedding reception bartender says. “Coors or Coors Light.”
Your new supervisor likes playing music at work. He’s into rap metal.
You accidentally make eye contact with the loud, drunk guy at the bar. He smiles and begins approaching you.
You turn on the light in the Motel 6 bathroom. There are short, curly hairs in the sink.
“Let me tell you about our rewards program,” the cashier says. You take a frantic look at your watch and try to tell her you aren’t interested, but she presses on anyway.
I look across the restaurant and spot a fat, older guy. I realize it’s a mirror.
You complete the 20-page online form and hit “SEND.” Your screen locks up.
“First of all, I apologize that we’re running so much longer than we anticipated,” the guy at the front of the room says. “Now we have a Powerpoint presentation for you.”